what a cool thing! people actually read this blog, from time to time; even “like” posts and sometimes comment. thank you :)
i do not take you for granted!
regret not having posted anything for the past couple days…i had to go out of town for my last scheduled cancer treatment. i have lymphoma. i’m kinda down, cause the doctor explained (again!) that i am “incurable” and i’m not in remission: i have active cancer from neck to groin. but they had scheduled me for twenty treatments – told me i would be on this chemo “for the rest of my life” – and i guess i outlived what they thought would be the rest of my life… yay!! i’ve had rituximab every three months for the past five years. i had reached stage 4 before anybody noticed i was sick.
so now we start the treatment protocol called “watch and wait.” wait for what? i have been very vocal in opposing the cessation of the treatments, but i guess one can only get so much for free… i am a veteran of the us army – oh, never in combat roles! first a trumpet player, then a psychotherapist – and the american public has been footing the bill for my treatment: thanks americans!! i mean that sincerely!
i was on active duty for 8 years, which, coincidentally, is roughly how long i’ve been getting treated for the cancer. what? you thought i said 5 years? ah, yes. the first 2-3 years i was on three different aggressive therapies. the first two were not effective at all and they had to stop giving me the one that did work because i had been on these toxic chemicals for so long there was real risk they would kill me. one way or the other i’m going to die – but don’t we all???
anyway, i hope to get over feeling sorry for myself soon and get back to writing, or cutting and pasting, or whatever i do here… and i hope to see you back again! thanks for visiting pzykrsis :)